TEN THINGS TO REMEMBER TO DO BEFORE PESACH

 

1. Panic

2. Think of the number of rooms you have.

Then count up of the number of wardrobes /  closets /drawers / desks /  shelves / boxes you have in each room.

Multiply it by the number of children who make a mess ( are there any other sort of children?)

Divide it by the number of days until Pesach

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3. Decide you should have started Pesach cleaning  six months ago.

4. Remember that in the ‘old days’, before Pesach, they used to just ‘shave off’ the top layer of their wooden table to reveal beneath it a completely clean unused tabletop Pesach.

5. DON’T try that with your dining room table that you were given by your in-laws when you got married.

6. Remember the Rabbanim say it is definitely wrong to dread Pesach more than Tisha Be’Av.

I’m working very hard on that one.

7. Remember, Dust is not Chametz and your children should not be turned into Pesach sacrifices.

I remember only too well how  I neglected my kids the weeks before Pesach  when they were young..

I just pray my children don’t treat my grandchildren so badly.

8. Yes, that green sludge at the bottom of your child’s ‘tik ochel’ was once up on a time a time a delicious sandwich.

Does it still count as “chametz”?

Who cares – you don’t really want to leave it there  another year do you??

9. Remember all new “olim”. There’s only one Seder night here. If you sleep through it, from  exhaustion,  there’s no action-replay the next night.

 

10. A couple of days ago my daughter asked me to go with her to a “ how to get organized” evening – she’d tried all her sisters and none of them were interested!!

“ OK” I said “When and where is it?”

Her answer ?

“ I don’t know I can’t find  the advert”

(Gimmee a break – that is just tooo stupid to be made up)